My colleague Edith has a student whose English name is Hitler. When she asked him why he chose that moniker , he said, “I like it.’’ I doubt that he even knows who Hitler is. Some Chinese students pick their English names out of thin air. Others adopt the names of famous people, colors, weather conditions or anything else that strikes their fancy. Here are some of the more exotic English names in our classes: Rain, Shine, Orange, Dream, Holiday, Wing, Timberlake and Jane Eyre. There’s also a girl named Jason and a boy named Bling.
***
Fat people in China are as rare as skinny people at an all-you-can-eat buffet. I don’t know whether it’s genetics or diet (probably both), but the Chinese never have to worry about squeezing into a bus seat or overloading an elevator. The women are particularly thin, with tiny waists, small busts and nonexistent backsides. Not that I’m paying much attention.
***
Taxi drivers are the same everywhere. If they think you’re a naïve tourist, they’ll try to take advantage of you. I took a cab to the university this morning and the fare was 39 yuan ($6.37). When I gave the cabdriver a 50 yuan bill, he smiled, said goodbye in Chinese and turned away. After I pointed to the meter, he sheepishly reached in his pocket and handed me the correct change.
***
Four is considered an unlucky number here because the Chinese word for four sounds similar to the word for death. Some buildings don’t have fourth floors and Beijing’s traffic bureau stopped issuing license plates with the No. 4. A Toronto suburb with a large population of Chinese immigrants recently banned the number from new street addresses. When I was asked to choose a local phone number by China Mobile, they showed me a list of available numbers. Almost every one had a lot of fours in it.
***
When dad is away, the dogs will play. Pat told me Solo recently ate a bar of soap, then threw up three times. And Koji grabbed a chicken salad sandwich from my 91-year-old father-in-law and broke the skin on his finger. I wish they were here, but they’re definitely better off at home. In China, they still eat dog meat.
you’re kidding, I thought that was a myth about them eating dogs
Are there any A-arons (Aaron), Jaykwallens (Jacqueline), or Bahlakehs (Blake)?
Head out to the country. You might find some women more to your liking in terms of being stout of body.
What’s going on with the hoops scene there?
A few more choice name selections I’ve heard either since I arrived here or during my last trip five years ago: Hawaii (female), Wallax (male – I found out it’s the name of a household cleaning product in China), Mimosa (female), Clever (male – I couldn’t help but tell him that that’s…clever), Pampers (male), Plastic Bag (!?!), and Israel (female, formerly known as “Yearn”).